Robin Martin of Joseph is a two-time cancer survivor.

Robin Martin’s sparkling presence can be found all around Joseph. She’s an active member of the Joseph United Methodist Church, works tirelessly at the Magic Garden and is a frequent figure at the Wallowa County Farmers Market on Main Street.

Just beyond her contagious laughter and compassionate blue eyes, however, there’s a suffering few can fully understand.

Surviving cancer will tear your life apart and test both your own spirit as well as those around you.

Martin has been there — twice.

Martin was a 37-year-old special-education teacher in California in 1989 when she discovered a lump in her breast during a self examination. She wasn’t too concerned. Her OB/GYN had drained a previous lump in the same area and told her that it wasn’t an issue. Turned out, it was.

“He called me into his office and told me the biopsy he had taken was breast cancer.”

Her thoughts immediately turned to her daughter.

“I decided I would do whatever I needed to do to stay alive for my 6-year-old daughter. I was determined to see my daughter grow up. … You can sit in the corner and wait to die, or you can go on with your life. I chose to go on with my life.”

Throughout her treatment she missed just two days of work. When too tired to stand, she draped her upper body across a tall countertop to support her weight as she taught.

Her husband David, also a teacher, was shocked and scared.

“Normally when younger women are diagnosed with breast cancer, it’s an aggressive form, and mine was,” she said.

Fortunately, the cancer was caught before it reached her lymph nodes. She had both chemotherapy and radiation treatment. The intensity of the treatment caused her to lose her hair, but she opted not to wear a wig — even while attending her 20th high school reunion.

Martin’s type of cancer was aggressive, and in 1989 the medical field didn’t stage cancers by their progression.

“At the time I had my first chemotherapy, it was a very basic chemotherapy that was given to everyone. … I had to take 18 pills every single morning — a big, giant pile of pills in my hand.”

She took as many pills as she could at one time.

“After two weeks I would just look at them and gag. You had to get them down. You couldn’t throw them up because it was part of your daily regimen for fighting the cancer.”

On her own, Martin added the then-unusual step of incorporating meditation into her daily routine. It consisted of visualizing her mind attacking the cancer.

In the end, the treatments worked. She went to battle with her cancer and she was able to come out the other side a blessed and grateful survivor.

Five years later, almost to the day, cancer again knocked at the door.

“We were up here (visiting their property) staying in our barn. I was sleeping on the ground and I could feel a tumor on the other side. I never even said anything because I thought it was a recurrence, and it would be the last summer I would spend with my family.”

Back in San Diego, she told her doctor that she suspected a recurrence. Tests showed a different form of breast cancer, which required different treatment. It was an estrogen positive cancer, meaning that it fed on the estrogen in her body.

“I didn’t have to have the IV chemotherapy where you lose your hair.”

Although this cancer wasn’t as aggressive, Martin found herself agonizing over treatments that had a major impact on her life.

“What people don’t realize with cancer patients is that you have all these appointments and checkups, and if you have a pain the day after, you think, ‘Oh, they missed something.’ I finally got to the point where I was just really tired of the constant anxiety, so I chose to have a double mastectomy. I was just at the point I didn’t want to deal with it anymore.”

Following surgery, Martin made another life-altering decision.

“I decided to have reconstructive surgery. At the time I was just 42 years old, and it was difficult to see myself in the mirror. It always brought the whole cancer experience back to me.”

Surgeons removed tissue from her stomach area in an attempt to reconstruct her breasts, but the procedure did not go well. Complications led to a 13-hour stay on the operating table, more than twice as long as normal.

The surgeons were unable to complete the reconstruction because of blood flow issues relating to previous radiation treatments. A skin graft that resulted from the failed surgery took a long time to heal, while a stroke during the surgery left her without the ability to speak for some time. Some of the scarring went deeper than that.

“It was a very, very traumatic experience, and it brings back a lot of sad, disappointed … almost post-traumatic stress kind of symptoms. It was a very difficult time.”

She said her support groups, friends and family helped her through the darkest days, even if she had to make the first move.

“When I was first diagnosed, there was still a real stigma around having cancer. When I told people that I had breast cancer they were surprised that I would let anyone know.”

This included women she knew with the disease who looked at it as a shameful kind of illness. Even her friends initially kept a hands-off approach.

“I had to make the first move — the first contact, because people were just so afraid I was going to die, and they didn’t know what to say.”

The ordeal also left deep scars on the couple’s only biological child, who was well aware of the illness.

“She saw me go through treatment; she knew I was bald. Later, when she saw that I had a double mastectomy she touched my arm and said, ‘Oh mama, it isn’t that bad.’ She was always very, very supportive, but she cannot remember her childhood, and I think it was because it was so traumatic.”

The marriage suffered as well.

“The thought of losing a spouse so young, the deformity of a body, having the emotional trauma we both went through … you can imagine that yes, it did interfere with our relationship. But David was steadfast and loving the whole time.”

She says God was her personal therapist, and support groups also were an important recovery aid.

“As a young woman, unless you have other young women to talk to, it can be really scary — it hangs over your head. I lost a lot of friends from those support groups. Many died. It was very, very difficult, and the one thing that has colored the rest of my life is: Why am I the one that survived this when so many of the friends I met in these groups did not?”

She still doesn’t know.

“It’s a lifelong search I think.”

It’s been 28 years since Martin was first diagnosed and she no longer gets regular cancer screenings because of the expense involved. The chemotherapy left its own mark on her health in the form of weight battles, arthritis and secondary fibromyalgia, which left her with chronic pain.

“It’s not easy to put cancer in the back of my mind, but I’ve determined that every single day I’m going to feel blessed.”

These days Martin participates in a longitudinal breast cancer survival study. She is one of the study’s oldest participants.

“To be a survivor for that length of time and to be able to participate in this study has been helpful in being able to continue to pursue getting rid of this stuff — forever.

“It’s a different life than I thought I’d lead, that’s for sure. The walk through the depth of despair and the tragedy that I have experienced physically in my life — you just get to the point where you truly can see the mountain tops and recognize that every single day is better than when you were down below. Every day of my life since, I have tried to say, ‘This day is a gift.’”

Martin advises those struggling with a serious illness to do research and take notes when seeing a medical doctor or naturopath.

“Listen to all forms of medicine, and don’t rule out anything. Listen to your gut.”

She urges people to try combining naturopathy with traditional medicine.

“Don’t let the medical community bully you into thinking that you can’t do both.”

Martin found it the most challenging part of her illness. “You had to be the strength behind your own support system, so they could eventually stand behind you and stand for you, and eventually they were all able to do that.”

She also urges those who have friends with serious illnesses to reach out.

“Make a call, send a card or make a meal. Even if all you can say is ‘I don’t know what to say,’ then that’s OK because it shows at least that you care.”